To, my 200th post, and a few good men.

I've always expected my 200th blog post to be a cheery affair ever since i was pondering on post number 160 but sadly, this post is everything but a cheery affair.

Have you ever come across a person in your live who just deprives you of what you enjoy doing? Someone to whom you plead sincerely and frantically for something only to be ignored? Someone who makes instant harsh desicions because of one idiot and that jeopardises others? I thought i've never, until this noble man i once look up to in admiration came along. Familiar as he always is, mr. zol.

Athletics and football in smkts has never been in good terms since god knows when. Its like the british and the irish, or the greeks and trojans. Or so it is amongst the coaches as far as im concerned. We from the athletics team will make this illegal transition to football without mr. zol's knowledge only to be discovered later on and given the cold treatment.

Illegal is ONLY when your football agendas are clashing with your athletic's. According to mr. zol, "you can play only if all your competitions are over". Those are the exact words strictly implemented into our naive little minds when he notices the football craze slowly overshadowing our athletic's priorities. Once your done with your running and jumping and whatever shit sport you've been forced to take part in, even more so when you're in your last year of school and your athletics "career" ends prematurely because you're too lousy to qualify for the next phase of competitions. Then according to the man himself, you can break every bone in your body for fuck cares.

See. All these words of fuckwisdom. And what happens now? It all seems like he's never oozed any similiar sounding shit from his voice box ever. Oh yeah, i forgot about the rule. The incomprehensibly idiotic fucked-up rule. Said to be created by the upper authorities of the school. "Athletes are NOT allowed to play football". Sounds like a brilliant plan to keep every runner in their best conditions before competitions but when you implement it after every is done and over like me. It becomes worse than the mppj bastards building a field and informing residents that they cant use it. No, not only that, it becomes a load of fucking fucked up bollocks.

Here's my problem. I ran for the school since i was in wee form 2. As far as i know, carried the school name to maybe a new level. Once or twice made the school proud. And this year i finally bowed out of athletics with a 5th place finish in the heptathlon. My oh-so-noble coach mr. zol personally came up to me and said this is the end of my athletics, which in my vocabulary, means i no longer am tied to the leash of the school like all athletes. Neither do i see any mistake in taking up another sport. Plus my other sport in school is football. So of course i would go to football, i wouldnt wanna sit around doing nothing and still be calling myself the "prestigious" title of a school athlete. And then what happens? Some idiot(no names mentioned) has more competitions but insists on playing for the school football team, then the news broke to beloved mr. zol and in a fit of rage, drank his coffee, shouted at mr. kamal(football coach) and harshly forbid every school athlete from football. Yea thanks alot.

I usually dont beg but beg i did for the past two days. Not literally on my knees kinda beg but the explain my condition and desire kinda beg. The noble one wasnt around so i had to resort to telephones and text messaging. This was my desperate plea:

"Hello sir. I still dont understand why you and the school would make a decision to disallow me to play football. I have finished my athletics and i wish to have nothing else to do with it already. I totally understand if you dont allow *blah blah blah* to play but i have finished my competitions already. I am not influenced by other people into this decision. I really really want to play football and i enjoy doing so. So please sir. I just want to represent the school in football one last time and thats it. Please sir."

Thats my 5 page long message and nope, i didnt get a reply. NO REPLY!!! Tell me guys, how heartless and selfish can a person get? I'm done with running, he knows it. I really really want to play football, he knows it. Then why be so selfish to this extend of forbiding me of doing what i enjoy when it wouldn't even hurt anybody?! I've been banging fists and my head on walls and i still DONT GET IT! All i need is a bloody YES from him and there i'll be happy as a butterfly, go play my football, contribute to the team and to the school and then DONE! I come back, i walk around school, go for your pjk classes, focus on my subjects like normal! I dont see why i'm still tied to this athletics chain when you personally told me i'm done already! Guys. Please. You know how this feels. You read this post, and you'll know how i feel right now. Someone stopping you from doing what you enjoy doing for NO fucking particular reason at all! Its just plain selfish and self-centered. Its not like he has plans for me. He just does it. For his own ego.

WHY??????????????????????????

WHY THE FUCK DO THIS?????????

I JUST WANNA PLAY FOOTBALL..

Thats all i'm asking for from you. Thats all i'm asking for! You self-centered egoistic man! Even your wealth of experience and knowledge cannot help you get my respect for this.

This post is not meant for silent dissing. Its publicised for god's sake. I pray your "loyal" athletes and pet-students read this and then break the news to you so that you know how selfish you've been to me.

I'm hurt and frustrated beyond comprehension.

Jinny